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** Tip Of The Day –  Test That Printer

** Today in History –  Hail storm surprises Dallas residents

** Trivia

** Quote of the Day

** Woman in Business –  Classified Ads - What Works & What Doesn’t By Diana Barnum

** Grins –  Help Wanted

** "Cooking for the Empty Nest" –  Spinach & artichoke dip

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Test That Printer

If you are in the market for a new printer, you should always test it before you actually buy it. You might be asking,  Ask one of the sales people at the store you're at to run a test print for you.Most printer display models are powered up and ready to print test pages, so it shouldn't be too much of a problem. You're the one buying the printer and you need to make sure it's everything you're hoping it is.

By doing a test print, you will be able to see the printer's overall quality and decide if it's gwhat you want. You may need your printer for various reasons and you should make sure that a particular printer will be able to handle all of those tasks for you. Also, you will be able to hear the noises the printer makes.

Sometimes inkjets are very noisy or a printer shakes a little when it's printing. You may not want something like that, so you need to be aware of everything you're getting along with the printer. The test print will also allow you to see the whole process of printing within that printer and you'll get to experience how it will work for you in your home.

Bob

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Mutiny on the HMS Bounty

On this date in 1995, the Dallas, Texas, area was hit by torrential rains and a severe hailstorm that left 17 dead and many others seriously wounded. The storm, which hit both Dallas and Tarrant counties, was the worst recorded hail storm to hit the United States in the 20th century.

The storm came on a Friday afternoon, when warm weather had drawn many people to outdoor events in the area. It came on suddenly and many people had not yet sought shelter when tennis-ball-sized hail began to fall. Victims suffered broken bones, deep lacerations or bruises from the hail stones. The hail also broke windows, dented cars and trucks and destroyed crops. Air traffic throughout the country was delayed because of the sudden problems in Dallas. However, the hail was not responsible for the 17 people who lost their lives that day. Instead, it was the accompanying flash flooding that caused the 17 fatalities. Most of the deceased drowned after becoming trapped in their cars.

In order for hail to fall, there must be powerful updrafts of warm air combined with colder clouds. For that reason, hail storms virtually always occur in the late spring or early fall and in the afternoon. The warm air at the ground--heated from a full day of sun--rises and brings with it salt, dust and other particles. When these particles meet with the super-cooled water in a cloud, ice forms over them. As the particles continue to rise, bouncing as if on a trampoline within a towering cloud, the icy particles grow and grow until gravity sends them plunging to the ground. A large hail stone has layers of ice almost like an onion.

It is estimated that a two-pound hail stone requires a 400 mile-per-hour updraft in order to keep it in the air long enough to reach that size. Reportedly, items as large as frogs, worms and fruit have been swept up by updrafts and turned into hail.
 
 

Classified Ads - What Works & What Doesn’t By Diana Barnum

 Do classified ads really work? Should you include an email address or fax number in them? How about a call to action?

Questions like these are often brought to the attention of OhioHelp.net, an Ohio-based company specializing in helping businesses worldwide with their marketing, public relations and freelance writing services. Here are some top tips they offer based on their own client projects.

TOP TIPS FROM OHIOHELP.NET

I. CLASSIFIED AD PLACEMENT

Study the ads in publications where you would like to place yours to see what works. And STUDY them like you'll have an exam over them. If you didn't see the ad before, skip it. Only focus on those who repeatedly placed the same ads - -these people are selling off of them: bottom line.

While you’re at it, call some of those companies who are not your direct competitors and ask how their ads pull (and log their replies for reference). Exchange contact information and follow up so that you can possibly team up with them later in a joint venture and send clients back and forth.

Results show that small ads placed in inexpensive publications generally bring in phone calls and clicks to websites, but no email replies. And on the average, these callers reported having limited or no Internet access along with limited or no computer / email capabilities in their homes. If they had access at work, it was limited and did not offer personal / private email. Toll-free numbers brought in more responses than local numbers with area codes. And fax numbers brought in nothing at all.

II. CLASSIFIED AD GIFTS

Sales increased with the inclusion of Gift and Reward items in a call-to-action ad.  Popular items were:

A. A No-Cost Information Kit that included a variety of tip sheets, electronic books and software sent via downloadable links in printed sales letters and included on disks or CDs.  All items were mailed Flat Rate via Priority Mail.

B. A Book / workbook set sent the same way or mailed Media Rate in a manila envelope. Sets were for a trial period before purchasing. And No-Cost Information Kits above were included in the package.

C. A special “Freebie” item of their choice from our bookstore was mailed or emailed with mention of the ad.

III. CLASSIFIED AD COPYWRITING

To increase customer contact, communication and overall sales, include specific pricing in the ad; for example, say, “rates from $39.” Also list an email address with a domain name and specific person to contact. In other words, instead of emailing info@aol.com, email diana@ohiohelp.net using a first name for familiarity. (Note that some classifieds charge a 3-word count for URLs but only a 1-word count for email addresses.) And use an action verb in your call-to-action, “Mention Ad for…”

IV. CLASSIFIED TIPS

Remember:

• Keep up. Keep educating yourself and your helpers. For example, inexpensive company subscriptions to a monthly ebook club http://presssuccess.com/wholesale and the jvAlert Perpetual Learning Series www.jvAlert.com/LearningSeries.aspx?id=1805  help to catch up with the latest scoop -- what works and what doesn’t work from top-level marketers & industry leaders.

• Prepackage info into autoresponders http://presssuccess.com/AutoPilot with a 30-day no-cost trial period. Then the info can be sent upon request immediately to prospective clients. Treat information requests like proposals & include past work you’ve done in the field, samples, references, additional resources, your credentials, etc.

So sharpen your pencil or grab your keyboard and tune up your classified campaigns. Testing and improving your ads can definitely increase sales.

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By Diana Barnum, CEO of http://ohiohelp.net . For more help with marketing, public relations and writing, email diana@ohiohelp.net or call: (614)529-9459. Help yourself to no-cost ebooks and other goodies at: http://movingaheadcommunications.com/freebies.html

   A Little Humor to Start the Week 

Help Wanted
=-=-=-=-=-=-=

A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window, stating the following:

HELP WANTED
Must be able to type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer.
 

A short time afterwards, a dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign, looked at it and whined.

Getting the idea, the receptionist got the office manager. The office manager looked at the dog and was surprised, to say the least. However, the dog looked determined, so he lead him into the office. Inside, the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager. The manager said, "I can't hire you. The sign says you have to be able to type." The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter and proceeded to type out a perfect letter. He took out the page and trotted over to the manager and gave it to him, then jumped back on the chair. The manager was stunned, but then told the dog, "The sign says you have to be good with a computer."

The dog jumped down again and went to the computer. The dog proceeded to enter and execute a perfect program, that worked flawlessly the first time. By this time the manager was totally dumbfounded!

He looked at the dog and said, "I realize that you are a very intelligent dog and have some interesting abilities. However, I still can't give you the job." The dog jumped down and went to a copy of the sign and put his paw on the sentence that told about being an Equal Opportunity Employer The manager said, "Yes, but the sign also says that you have to be bilingual."

The dog looked at the manager calmly and said, "Meow."

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Worried about an IRS audit? Avoid what's called a red flag. That's something the IRS always looks for.

As an example, if you have some money left in your bank account after paying your taxes. That's a red flag.

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John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.
 

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy,  their 11 year old son returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late.
 

'Where have you been?  Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?'asked John.
 

'Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project,' said Tommy.
 

The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.
 

'Son,' said John, 'this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school.'
 

'We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' said Tommy.
 

'What did you watch?' asked Marsha.
 

'The Ten Commandments.' answered Tommy.
 

The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off his chair once more.
 

With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.'
 

'I am ashamed of you son,' said John. 'When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.'
 

The robot then walked around to John and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.
 

Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, 'Boy, did you ever ask for that one!   You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!'

With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair.

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Riddle

I am one simple word, but I mean different things.
One of my meanings brings great forceful swings.
The other of me, may have curve, like the first.
But only one meaning can help quench a thirst.
One of my meanings will often bring cheers.
Either of them could hold a few beers.

Do you know the answer? If not, look for the solution later in this newsletter.

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"All good one liners are one character too lon"
 

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"Cooking for the Empty Nest"
Recipe of the Week
by Susan Kemp

1/4 cup olive oil
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
3/4 cup diced white or yellow onion
1 1/2 tablespoons minced garlic
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cups chicken stock
1 1/2 cups heavy cream
3/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
2 tablespoons crumbled bouillon cubes
1 1/2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice
1 teaspoon sugar
3/4 cup sour cream
12 ounces frozen spinach, defrosted, drained, & chopped
6 ounces canned artichoke bottoms, drained and cut into
1/8-inch slices
1 cup finely shredded Monterey Jack cheese
3/4 teaspoon hot sauce (such as Tabasco)

In a large saucepan, warm the olive oil and butter together over medium heat. When the butter has melted, add the onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until wilted, 3 to 4 min.

Stir in the garlic and cook 2 to 3 minutes longer, stirring frequently and stopping before the onion and garlic brown.

Sprinkle the flour and continue cooking, stirring continuously, until the mixture turns a golden-blond color, 10 to 15 minutes. Then, whisking continuously, slowly pour in the stock until it is smoothly incorporated. When the mixture begins to simmer, stir in the cream. Let it return to the simmer. Remove from the heat, add the parmesan, chicken base or bouillon cubes, lemon juice, and sugar, and stir until thoroughly blended. Add the sour cream, spinach, artichoke bottoms, Monterey Jack cheese and hot sauce, and stir until the ingredients are thoroughly combined and the cheese has melted. Transfer to a warmed serving bowl and serve immediately with toasted pita chips that have been cut into wedges.

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If you have a favorite recipe that you would like to share, please send it to mailto:bob@adv-marketing.com?Subject=RecipesBe sure to read back recipes of the week at:
http://adv-arketing.com/business/frtest.htm and Click on ?Recipe of the Week"

Yours in cooking - Sue

A pitcher.

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Copyright - 2008